Folders

When I think I have reached the limit of ridiculousness I see from students, another does something to push my sensitive sense of sensitibilities even farther down inside the deep crevices of my gut.

Folders.

Imagine, if you will, a soft, paper folder with three metal tabs in the middle to keep the papers inside the folder. You probably used these all the time in middle/high school. You probably got one during a meeting with all the bs handouts your boss thought you "needed" to be more producitve and not waste work time writing blogs or on facebook. You may have seen these for .10 at Target, Wal-Mart, CVS, OfficeDepot or any number of stores that sell office supplies during the first month of school.

These folders are not difficult to use. Really. You open the folder. You open the tabs. You put papers in the tabs. You close the tabs. You close the folder.

You're done.

I require that each of my 8th grade students have one of these folders to keep their writings. We spent no less than2 hours (YES, TWO HOURS) putting these folders together. (Anyone who thinks teachers don't work hard enough, really need to spend just one day in a public school to be a witness to some of what we deal with every day). I made it crystal clear that I would not grade any work that is not in the folder AND in the right section of the folder.

99% of my students have their folders in working order. 99% of my students use the folders effectively and do a pretty good job of managing their work.

The 1% is what bothers me.

I have a child who (until today when I just gave him a folder) was using a folder without the tabs. You may be wondering why the tabs are so important: Middle school children are messy. Tabs are necessary.

Consequently, his folder looked like a recycling center threw up. Serioiusly. Every day this child comes in and spills no less than 20 papers on the floor and then spends no less than 15 minutes sorthing through them. We're packing up to leave and he's just finding blank lined paper.

Today I reached my wits' end. I made this child put his folder together correctly. The prcess (which should have taken 5 minutes, max) took no less than 90 minutes, even with me sitting next to him and spoon feeding him the order. He spent 15 minutes (and yes, I was counting) trying to figure out how to open the tabs after he realized that jabbing the papers at the tabs would not reach the goal of getting the papers in the tabs. He spent 15 more minutes putting hte papers in backwards. He spent 15 more minutes stabbing his stubby little fingers at the tabs, trying to close them, after putting in only one of the 50 papers that go in the folder.

I sat there patiently. And wished I had invested in the pocket flask I saw in Orlando.

I sat there as he continued to ask "how does this work?" and I replied "figure it out." Mean? Yes. BUT not as mean as it will be when he is working at McDonalds and can't figure out how to OPEM the bag to get the fries IN the bag. Or, it won't be as mean as when he's working as a waiter and can't figure out how to put the water IN the glass and not ON your lap. I'm doing you a public service. You're welcome.

This is the future. Move to Australia.

*M*